It may only be food to you, but to me it\u2019s the Eighth wonder of the World!
\nI know, as well as the next person, that food is the sustenance of life, but that isn\u2019t what I\u2019m praising. Twinkies do not sustain life. They, and all their wonderful cousins (junk food in general) do, however, make life fun. I like fun, or perhaps I should say fun food, and, like most Americans, I have fun down to a science.
\nThe controversy over what foods are good or bad for you is an issue that people like me choose to ignore. It takes all the fun out of eating.
\n
\nPlease understand that I am what researchers term average. That means I have no blatant eating disorders or illness, which might be aggravated by consuming large quantities of fun food. No danger at least for the next 24 hours. So, bordering on deliberate ignorance and pure bliss, I indulge (and sometimes bulge).
\nI know there are others who feel as I do but it\u2019s a little embarrassing to admit to some of the behavior. For example, I often wake up in the morning thinking about all the really neat things I can eat that day. Mind you, my thoughts are not of whole grains or veggies. My thoughts are of chocolate, pizza, nachos, and the like. Fun, remember?
\nI keep hearing about the hazards of sugar but I try not to listen. I enjoy the shot-of-steam it gives me! A couple of chocolate chip cookies for breakfast and I move through my morning at a rate Superman would envy.
\nSpeaking of breakfast, coffee, in it\u2019s pure unadulterated state is incredible. One cup and the eyes are open, two cups and the body is moving. Three cups (added to my cookies) and driving to school is much easier because I can go after \u201call the idiots\u201d on the road before they come after me. Fun? I don\u2019t want to discuss it because I seem to be argumentative mornings, for some odd reason.
\nLunch at school is a real chore. All the food is separated from people like me by steel, glass, and Saran Wrap. \u201cProper\u201d portions are doled out, from a safe distance, by people who would beat me with a wooden spoon if I got out of control. Of course the salad bar is accessible, but my kind doesn\u2019t hang out there too often. Lettuce is nice but you could scarcely call it fun.
\nI also am forced, in public, to behave with a little dignity. Left to my own devices I would fill my tray to overflowing with Snowballs, chips, fries, whatever. Fun! It boggles the mind to think how quickly I would then be able to zip through the afternoon.
\nMy favorite season is just around the corner. Gifts are okay, but I\u2019m thinking about the parties. Nobody really cares if you stay by the food all evening and graze. Sure those chips and cheeses collect on the hips but it\u2019s no big deal. Winter clothes conceal a lot and I can always fast during Lent.
\nThe truth is, I know I should reform, but fun food has a way of calling me with voices as magical as Homer\u2019s Sirens. Maybe I\u2019ll make a commitment to mend my ways \u2013 tomorrow. How depressing; think I\u2019ll go have some fun first. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It may only be food to you, but to me it\u2019s the Eighth wonder of the World! I know, as well as the next person, that food is the sustenance of life, but that isn\u2019t what I\u2019m praising. Twinkies do not sustain life. They, and all their wonderful cousins (junk food in general) do, however, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-10644","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-tartan-news"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"cc_featured_image_caption":{"caption_text":false,"source_text":false,"source_url":false},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p5s3vR-2LG","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10644","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=10644"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10644\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":10645,"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/10644\/revisions\/10645"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=10644"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=10644"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sinclairclarion.com\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=10644"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}