Juice, P-Cubed and I thought we were so cool back in 2005 when we made our debut rap CD. But now when somebody tries to play it around me I have to run out of the room so I don’t die from laughing so hard.
We were offbeat, unoriginal and half our rhymes didn’t even rhyme, but we made a MySpace music page for it anyway hoping that all the hot chicks would hear it and want to be our groupies.
I would stay up all night acquiring just the right instrumentals for our sinister rhymes. Then P-Cubed would pick me up in the morning so we could go over to Juice’s house and make our East Side poetry.
Juice took rapping a lot more seriously than P-Cubed and I did. Juice tried to teach us how to write a verse, but it was no use. We were freestyle soldiers that refused to let pen and paper constrain our creativity.
“The grass is green and my teeth are yellow/ But you can’t mess with me cause I am that fellow/ Girls say hi and I say hello/ Ask for their number and they say hell no.”
Those were a couple of bars I spit over a Vanilla Ice beat that I thought were pretty sweet at the time.
At the end of all our recording sessions we would battle each other – if Juice’s mom didn’t kick us out first – but one day the battle got out of hand when P-Cubed lyrically slaughtered Juice over an old Eminem track. Juice kicked P-Cubed out and since he was my ride I left too.
That’s when it all went wrong.
The next day Juice released a diss song on P-Cubed that insinuated his private parts were rather tiny. When they finally saw each other at school Juice called P-Cubed a hater and P-Cubed called Juice a loser, and poof…the group was down to two members.
But after realizing I was smack dab in the middle of a rap beef, I too quit the group out of fear of being shot. To this day the three of us have yet to all stand in a room together and it’s probably for the best.
If we did ever get together, we would almost certainly make a comeback album.