What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas they say. And that which has occurred ahead of the Wednesday Democratic Debate is a strong reformation of that adage. Protests in our nation are far from new and far from ever disappearing. However, as the 2020 election races towards our nation with spiteful rage in its eyes, protesters in support of President Donald J. Trump have taken to the skies with an army of pigeons.
Yes, bird is indeed the word according to a mysterious prank group. As on Wednesday in downtown Las Vegas a swarm of pigeons wearing Trump’s signature MAGA hats were released just north of the Paris Theater, where the ninth Democratic Debate was hosted.
The masterminds behind this peculiar pack of pigeons are a prank group known as P.U.T.I.N. (oh the delicious irony). Despite what one might think, P.U.T.I.N. doesn’t represent the current president of Russia, but is an acronym meaning “Pigeons United to Interrupt Now.”
In a move that would give PETA a brain aneurysm, each pigeon was adorned with a miniature red “Make America Great Again ” ball cap kept on with eyelash glue.
Weirdly enough, this is not the first time people have played dress-up with birds in recent times. In Dec. 2019, a group of pigeons with cowboy hats, nicknamed Cluck Norris, Coolamity Jane and Billy the Pidge were found roaming Vegas. Sadly, Billie the Pidge died in mid-January, with many animal rights activists questioning whether or not the glued-on headgear contributed to the pigeons passing.
And in Jan. 2020, a flock of pigeons wearing sombreros were released, which caught even more media attention from animal services questioning if the hats threatened the well being of the pigeons themselves. P.U.T.I.N. founder Coo Hand Luke has denied ever releasing pigeons with sombreros or cowboy hats.
The people of P.U.T.I.N. released a press release providing little explanation as to why, but offered some insight regarding the training and research required to create the most conservative flock of birds since the eagles.
“One of the pigeons, the leader of the flock, was adorned with a small, orange hairpiece, to commemorate that of their leader, President Donald J. Trump.” said some person? “The project was the result of months of exhaustive research, logistical hurdles and pigeon caretaking.”
Coincidentally, the release of these patriotic pigeons coincided with Trump’s appearance on Friday the 20th. “The release date was also coordinated to serve as a gesture of support and loyalty to President Trump,” P.U.T.I.N. said.
Protests are an important way by which we can critique our government in a (mostly) peaceful manner. While laughably abnormal, these MAGA pigeons are an example of a protest done right. You don’t need a swarm of angry people with neon picket signs telling (insert name here) to die to send a message. Sometimes all you need to make a statement is a flock of pigeons wearing silly hats.
In the words of famed boxing promoter, Don King, “Only in America.”
Samuel J. Claude